I'm not as good as you think.

Yesterday , 12:30am I already on my bed.
Usually this time, I still in front of the computer.
Just yesterday less people online, so I off earlier than before.



Somehow, I just can't sleep.
Turning around on my bed.
Still. Can't sleep.


Somehow, I thought of my aunty.
My aunty who had passed away, roughly 3 months ago.


I really miss her.
Damn miss her.


I miss her look.

I miss her voice.

I miss her compliment for me.

I miss everything of her.




I'm a cold-blooded person.
I never do something for her.
Even before she passed away, when she still have consciousness, I was in the mall.
Watching movie with friends, Hanging out with friends.
Till the day I visited her.
She just lie on the bed.
In unconsciousness condition.




Ya. How cruel I am?!
I really want to call her aunty that time.
I'm not even have the chance to call her aunty for the last time.
Actually, I do have that chance.
Just, I don't appreciate it.
I dump it.
And now I regret for doing so.



----------------------------

To my beloved aunty,

I'm not a good girl that aunty used to praise me.

I bet aunty sure very dissapointed of me.

I cried for whole night yesterday.

I really miss you, aunty.



Really missing you.


Your niece,

Joe